Do You Have Faith or Fear?
Het Jy Geloof of Vrees?

Fear will be one of the greatest attacks that you will need to overcome. Rom. 12:21 tells us, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Fear will steal your faith and make you totally vulnerable to the enemy. When you listen to all that others tell you about what your wife is doing, not doing, or is planning to do, instead of keeping your eyes on the Lord and His Word, you will fail to focus on Him and you will begin to sink!

Vrees is een van die grootste aanvalle wat jy sal moet oorwin. Rom. 12:21 sê vir ons, “Laat jou nie deur die kwaad oorwin nie, maar oorwin die kwaad met die goeie.” Vrees sal jou geloof steel en van jou ‘n kwesbare teiken maak vir die vyand. Wanneer jy na ander luister oor jou vrou se doen en late, of wat sy beplan om te doen, instede daarvan dat, jy jou oë op Jesus en Sy Woord hou, sal jy misluk om op Hom te fokus en jy sal begin sink!

And you must speak the “truth” to everyone always about your faith in God’s ability and His desire to restore your marriage. Again, read the testimonies of restored marriages; then BELIEVE that yours will be added to theirs!

Jy moet altyd die “waarheid” met almal praat oor jou geloof en God se vermoë en Sy begeerte om jou huwelik te hertsel. Lees weer, die getuienisse van herstelde huwelike; en GLO dan dat joune by hulle sin bygevoeg sal wees.

An example of faith, Peter. Read the account of Peter in Matthew 14 starting in verse 22. Jesus asked Peter to walk on water. If He is asking you to walk on water, are you going to get out of the boat? Watch when Peter cries out to Jesus – it is always followed by the word immediately. Immediately, Jesus spoke to them and told them to take courage. Then later when Peter began to sink and he cried out to the Lord, “immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and took hold of him!” Matt. 14:31.

‘n Voorbeeld van geloof, Petrus. Lees die storie van Petrus in Matteus 14, wat begin by vers 22. Jesus het vir Petrus gevra om op die water te loop. Indien Jesus jou vra om op die water te loop, gaan jy uit die boot klim? Kyk wat gebeur wanneer Petrus na Jesus uitroep - dit is altyd deur die woord onmiddelik gevolg. Onmiddelik, het Jesus met hulle gepraat en gesê hulle moet moed skep. Toe later toe Petrus begin sink het en hy na Jesus uitgeroep het, “onmidellik het Jesus Sy hand uitgesteek en hom gegryp! Matt. 14:31.

Fear. A question we must ask ourselves is “why did Peter sink?” “But seeing the wind, he became afraid.” Matt. 14:30. If you look at your situation and at the battle that is raging before you, you will sink! Peter took his eyes off the Lord and the result was fear! It says, “he became afraid.” If you take your eyes off the Lord, you will become fearful.

Vrees. ‘n Vraag wat ons vir onsself moet vra is “waarom het Petrus gesink?” “Maar toe hy die sterk wind sien, het hy bang geword.” Matt. 14:30. As jy na jou situasie en die stryd wat voor jou wroeg kyk, sal jy sink! Petrus het sy oë van die Here afgehaal en die resultaat was vrees!Dit sê, “hy het bang geword.” As jy jou oë van die Here af neem, sal jy bang word.

Your testimony. Another very important point is to see what happened to the others who were in the boat. (Did you forget that there were others who didn’t get out of the boat?) It says, “And those who were in the boat worshiped Him saying, ‘You are certainly God’s Son!’ ” Matt. 14:33. Are you willing to allow God to use you to show His goodness, His loving kindness, His protection, and to draw others to Him? There is a great reward! This is evangelism. Others will come to you when they are having trouble because they have seen your peace despite your circumstances.

Jou getuienis. ‘n Ander punt wat belangrik is is om te sien wat met die ander wat in die boot was gebeur het. (Het jy vergeet dat daar ander was wat nie uit die boot geklim het nie?) Dit sê, “Toe kom dié wat in die skuit was, en val voor Hom neer en sê, ‘Waarlik, Jy is die Seun van God’” Matt. 14:33. Is jy gewillig dat God jou gebruik om Sy goedheid, Sy beskerming en Sy welwillendheid aan ander te wys? Daar is ‘n groot beloning! Dit is evangelieleer. Ander sal na jou toe kom wanneer hulle probleme ondervind omdat hulle jou vrede gesien het ongeag jou omstandighede. 

Overcome
Oorkom

The wind stopped. “And when they got into the boat, the wind stopped.” Matt. 14:32. Your battle will not go on forever. This test was needed to make Peter strong enough to be the “Rock” of which Jesus had spoken. (Matt. 16:18) Satan (and others working for him) will tell you that you will stay in the trial unless you get away, or give in and give up.

Die wind het gaan lê. “Daarop klim hulle in die skuit, en die wind het gaan lê.” Matt. 14:32. Jou stryd sal nie vir ewig aanhou nie. Hierdie toets was nodig om Petrus sterk genoeg te maak sodat hy die “Rots” genoem kan word, waarvan Jesus gepraat het. (Matt. 16:18) Satan (en ander wat vir hom werk) sal vir jou probeer vertel dat jy in hierdie beproewing sal bly tensy jy wegkom, of ingee en opgee.

God never intended us to remain “In the valley of the shadow of death.” In Proverbs 23 it says that we go “through the valley of the shadow of death.” Satan wants us to think that God wants us to live there! He wants to paint a “hopeless” picture! God is our hope, and hope is the faith in His Word that has been sown in our hearts.

God het nooit beoel dat ons “In ‘n dal van doodskaduwee” bly nie. In Spreuke 23 sê dit dat ons “deur ‘n dal van doodskaduwee” sal gaan. Satan wil hê ons moet dink dat God wil hê ons moet daar bly! Hy wil ‘n “hopelose” prentjie skilder! God is ons hoop, en hoop is die geloof in Sy Woord wat in ons harte gesaai is.

Faith
Geloof

Abraham. A second example is when Abraham was 90 years old and still without the child God had promised him. It says, “He hoped against hope.” (Rom. 4:18) Isn’t that awesome? Even when all hope was gone, he continued to believe God and take Him at His Word. We must do the same.

Abraham. ‘n Tweede voorbeeld van geloof is toe Abraham 90 jaar oud was en nog steeds sonder die kind wat God hom beloof het. Dit sê, Hy het teen hoop op hoop geglo” (Rom. 4:18). Is dit nie wonderlik nie?  Selfs toe daar geen meer hoop was nie, het hy voort gegaan om in God te glo en Hom op Sy Woord geneem. Ons moet dieselfde doen.

Act on the faith that you have. “And He said to them, ‘Because of the littleness of your faith; for truly I say to you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you shall say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it shall move; and nothing shall be impossible to you.’ ” Matt. 17:20.

Tree op in die geloof wat jy het. “En Jesus antwoord hulle, ‘Deur julle ongeloof; want, voorwaar Ek sê vir julle, as julle geloof het soos ‘n mosterdsaad sal julle vir hierdie berg sê, ‘Gaan weg hiervandaan daarnatoe! en hy sal weggaan; en niks sal vir julle onmoontlik wees nie.’” Matt. 17:20.

If you lack faith. If you lack faith, you should ask God for it. There is a battle, even for our faith. “Fight the good fight of faith….” 1Tim. 6:12. And “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the course, I have kept the faith….” 2Tim. 4:7 “And He (Jesus) could do no miracle there except that He laid His hands upon a few sick people and healed them. And He wondered at their unbelief.” Mark 6:5. When the Lord lays His hands on you and your marriage, will He marvel at YOUR unbelief?

As jy ‘n tekort aan geloof het. As jy ‘n tekort aan geloof hê moet jy vir God daarvoor vra. Daar is ‘n stryd, selfs vir ons geloof. “Stry die goeie stryd van die geloof….” 1 Tim. 6:12. En “Ek het die goeie stryd gestry; ek het die wedloop voleindig , ek het die geloof behou….” 2Tim. 4:7 “En Hy (Jesus) kon geen wonderwerk daar doen behalwe dat Hy ‘n paar siek mense genees het nie. Hy was verbaas oor hulle ongeloof.” Markus 6:5. Wanneer die Here Sy hande op jou en jou huwelik lê, sal Hy verbaas wees oor JOU ongeloof?  

Imitators of faith. We would do well to imitate those in Scripture who exhibited faith (you can find the Hall of Faith in Hebrews chapter 11). We need to act on God’s promises. “…but imitators of those who through faith and patience inherit the promises.” Heb. 6:12. There are many men who have followed the principles found in this book who have had victory over troubled or even broken marriages. Their testimonies will encourage you in your faith. Believe as the song says, “What He’s done for others, He’ll do for you!” Read all the incredible testimonies of marriages that God restored on our website at: www.MarriageHelpOnline.com.

Navolgers van Geloof. Ons sal goed doen as ons diegene in die  Bybel na-aap wat geloof vertoon het (jy kan alles oor die Saal van Geloof in Hebreërs hoofstuk 11 vind). Ons moet op God se beloftes reageer. “ sodat julle nie traag word nie, maar navolgers van hulle wat deur die geloof en lankmoedigheid erfgename van die belofte is, “ Heb. 6:12. Daar is baie mans wat die beginsels in hierdie boek gevolg het en wie die oorwinning behaal het oor hulle moeilike of selfs gebroke huwelike. Hulle getuienisse sal jou bemoedig in jou geloof. Glo wat die liedjie sê, “Wat Hy vir ander gedoen het, sal Hy ook vir jou doen!” Lees al die ongelooflike getuienisse van huwelike wat God herstel het op ons webwerf:  www.UiteindelikHoop.com.

Doubt Destroys
Twyfel Vernietig

Double-minded or doubting. You must not be double-minded. Your mind must not waver or doubt God. “But let him ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea driven and tossed by the wind. For let not that man expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, being a double- minded man, unstable in all his ways.” Jas. 1:6-8. “I hate those who are double-minded, But I love Thy law.” Ps. 119:13.

Dubbelhartigheid of twyfel. Jy moet nie dubbelhartig wees nie. Jou verstand moet nie in God twyfel nie. “Maar hy moet in die geloof bid, sonder om te twyfel; want hy wat twyfel, is soos ‘n golf van die see wat deur die wind gedrywe en voortgesweep word. Want dié mens moenie dink dat hy iets van die Here sal ontvang nie - so ‘n dubbelhartige man, onbestendig in al sy weë.” Jak. 1:6-8. “Twyfelaars haat ek, maar u wet het ek lief.” Ps. 119:13.

If you have trouble with double-mindedness, you need to read and meditate on God’s Word, which is the only truth! You MUST also separate yourself from ANYONE who continues to tell you something contrary to your desire or God’s ability to restore your marriage. You will learn in the upcoming chapter “Desires of Your Heart” that it doesn’t matter about your wife’s will to leave you and be with someone else. What matters is her heart. So be bold and speak the “truth” to everyone always about your faith in God’s ability and His desire to restore your marriage.

Indien jy ‘n probleem het met dubbelhartigheid, moet jy God se Woord lees en op God se Woord mediteer, wat die enigste waarheid is! Jy MOET ook jouself afsonder van ENIGIEMND wat vir jou aanhou iets vertel wat teenstrydig is met jou begeerte of God se vermoë om jou huwelik te herstel. Jy sal in die opkomende hoofstuk “Begeertes van Jou Hart” leer dat dit nie saak maak oor jou vrou se wil om jou te verlaat en saam iemand anders te wees nie. Wat saakmaak is haar hart. So wees dapper en praat altyd die waarheid met almal oor jou geloof in God se vermoë om jou huwelik te herstel.

Faith without works. “But someone may well say, ‘You have faith, and I have works; show me your faith without the works, and I will show you my faith by my works.’ ” Jas. 2:18. Show others that you have faith by your actions. If you believe that your wife will return to you, act like it. Make SURE you wear your wedding ring. Stop walking around like there is no hope. Don’t make plans that are not based on your marriage being restored! “But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless?” Jas. 2:20.

Geloof sonder werke. “Maar iemand mag wel sê: ‘Jy het die geloof en ek die werke. Toon my jou geloof uit jou werke, en ek sal jou uit my werke my geloof toon.’” Jak. 2:18. Wys vir ander dat jy geloof het deur jou dade. As jy glo dat jou vrou sal terugkeer na jou toe, tree so op. Maak SEKER jy jou trouring dra. Hou op om rond te loop asof daar nie hoop is nie. Moet nie planne maak wat nie gebaseer is op jou huwelik herstel nie! “Maar wil jy weet, o nietige mens, dat die geloof sonder werke dood is?” Jak. 2:20. 

Firm in your faith. Remind yourself of those who overcame and thus received the abundant life God promised. “But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world.” 1Pet. 5:9. Read and reread the testimonies on our website and in our book “God is Moving!” Keep the testimonies of others in the forefront of your mind. Those who believed God and never gave up now have a restored marriage. Share these testimonies with your family and friends who doubt that your marriage can be saved or that God can break the relationship she is in and turn her heart back to you.

Standvastig in jou Geloof. Herinner jouself aan diegene wat oorkom het en dus die oorvloedige lewe wat God belowe het ontvang het. “Hom moet julle teëstaan, standvastig in die geloof, omdat julle weet dat dieselfde lyding opgelê word aan julle broederskap wat in die wêreld is.” 1 Pet. 5:9. Lees en lees weer die getuienisse op ons webwerf en in ons boek “God is aan die Beweeg!” Hou die getuienisse van ander elke dag in gedagte. Diegene wie in God geglo het en nooit opgegee het nie het nou ‘n herstelde huwelik. Deel hierdie getuienisse met jou familie en vriende wat twyfel dat jou huwelik gered kan word of dat God die verhouding waarin sy is kan verbreek en haar hart na jou toe terugdraai.

How to Increase Your Faith
Hoe om Jou Geloof te Vermeerder

Faith. Read about different difficult situations in the Bible and identify your situation with theirs. Read how Jesus stilled the waves of the sea, to learn of His great power. (Mark 4:39) Read then how He fed the five thousand with the five barley loaves and two small fish, to know that He can do so much with very little. (John 6:1-15) Read how Jesus cleansed the lepers (Luke 17:11-17), healed the sick, opened the eyes of the blind (John 9:1-41), and forgave the fallen woman (John 8:3-11), so you will never doubt His mercy for you and your situation. Again, read the testimonies of restored marriages; then BELIEVE yours will be added to theirs!

Geloof. Lees oor verskillende situasies in die Bybel en identifiseer jou situasie met hulle sin. Lees hoe Jesus die golwe van die see stil gemaak het, om te leer van Sy groot mag. (Markus 4:39) Lees dan hoe Hy die vyf duisend mt die vyf garsbrode en twee klein vissies gevoer het, om te weet dat Hy soveel kan doen met so min. (Joh. 6:1-15) Lees hoe Jesus die melaatses genees het (Lukas 17:11-17), die siekes genees het, die oë van die blindes oopgemaak het (Joh. 9:1-41), en die owerspelige vrou vergewe het (Joh. 8:3-11), so jy sal nooit aan Sy genade vir jou en jou situasie twyfel nie. Lees weer, die getuienisse van herstelde huwelike; en GLO  dan dat joune by hulle sin gevoeg sal word!

The Word. How can we gain faith, or increase our faith? “So faith comes from hearing, and hearing by the Word of Christ.” Rom. 10:17. Read His Word and the testimonies of others. Surround yourself with faithful men who will believe with you. Those who have stood for God will teach you and hold you up. Many times we find that when you feel like you are almost out of faith, you should give away what little you have left. When God brings you in contact with another man who is having marriage trouble, encourage him and give him the rest of your faith. You will walk away rejoicing because God will fill you full of faith. (Please be very careful to only encourage and share your faith with other men - not women. We have seen more than one man fall into adultery this way.) Read 1Kgs. 17:12-15 to remember the widow who gave her last cake to Elijah and the miracle she received!

Die Woord. Hoe kan ons, ons geloof vermeerder? “Die geloof is dus uit die gehoor, en die gehoor is deur die Woord van God.” Rom. 10:17. Lees Sy Woord en die getuienisse van ander. Omsingel jouself met betroubare mans wie saam met jou sal glo. Daardie wat glo in God se beginsels sal jou leer en jou ophou. Baie keer vind ons dat wanneer jy voel asof jy amper uit geloof is, behoort jy weg te gee die bietjie wat jy oorhet. Wanneer God jou in kontak bring met ‘n ander man wie huweliks probleme het, bemoedig hom en gee hom die res van jou geloof. Jy sal altyd verheug wegloop omdat God jou vol geloof sal vul. (Wees asseblief baie versigtig om net jou geloof en bemoediging met ander mans te deel - nie vrouens nie. Ons het meer as een man gesien wat op hierdie manier in owerspel betrokke raak.) Lees 1 Kon. 17:12-15 om die weduwee te onthou wie haar laaste koek vir Elia gegee het en die wonderwerk wat sy ontvang het!

So many come to us for help and fail to reap a restored marriage because they feel they are unable to sow into anyone else’s life as they are struggling to save their own marriage. This is unbiblical and contrary to God’s principles. Get yourself an Encouragement Partner by joining our Restoration Fellowship and help him restore his marriage. All you need is one other man who is trying to restore his marriage. God will use you powerfully as you minister to other men in your pain and lack – and God will bless your efforts with “a peace that surpasses all understanding” and a restored marriage!

So baie kom na ons toe om hulp en misluk om ‘n herstelde huwelik te saai omdat hulle voel hulle is nie in staat om in enigiemand anders se lewe te saai nie omdat hulle sukkel om hulle eie huwelike te red. Dit is onbiblies en in teenstryding aan God se beginsels. Kry vir jou ‘n Bemoediging Vennoot deur by ons Herstel Gemenskap aan te sluit en help hom om sy huwelik te herstel. Al wat jy nodig het is een ander man wat probeer om sy huwelik te herstel. God sal jou magtig gebruik soos wat jy aan ander mans minister in jou pyn en tekort - en God sal jou seën met jou pogings met ‘n “vrede wat alle verstandhouding te bowe gaan” en ‘n herstelde huwelik! 

Obedience. Don’t forget that obedience to God is paramount to victory. Don’t forget what Jesus said, “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven; but he who does the will of My Father who is in heaven. And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; DEPART FROM ME, YOU WHO PRACTICE LAWLESSNESS.’ ” Matt. 7:21, 23. If you “practice” or keep doing what you now know is contrary to the Biblical principles found in this book – your marriage will NOT be restored!

Gehoorsaamheid. Moenie vergeet dat gehoorsaamheid aan God die sleutel tot oorwinning is nie. Moet nie vergeet wat Jesus gesê het nie, “Nie elkeen wat vir My sê Here, Here! sal ingaan in die koninkryk van die hemele nie, maar hy wat die wil doen van my Vader wat in die hemele is. En dan sal Ek aan hulle sê, ‘EK HET JULLE NOOIT GEKEN NIE. GAAN WEG VAN MY, JULLE WAT DIE ONGEREGTIGHEID WERK! ‘ “ Matt. 7:21, 23. As jy aanhou om te doen wat jy weet die teenoorgeestelde is van die Bibliese beginsels wat in hierdie boek gevind is  - sak jou huwelik NIE herstel word nie!

In God’s will. If your heart convicts you that you are not in God’s will and that you are not following His principles, then of course you will have no confidence and no faith to receive your request from the Lord. Ask God to “break” you so your will will become His will.

In God se wil. As jou hart jou oortuig dat jy nie in God se wil is nie en dat jy  nie Sy voorskrifte navolg nie, dan sal jy natuurlik geen vertroue en geen geloof hê om jou versoek van die Here te ontvang nie. Vra God om jou te “breek” sodat jou wil Sy wil sal word.

You MUST Wait
Jy MOET Wag

Wait. Assuredly, there will be many “battles” that must be fought (and won) in the war against your marriage. Just remember, “When the battle is the Lord’s, the victory is ours!

Wag. Verseker, sal daar baie “stryde” wees wat geveg moet word (en gewen) in die oorlog teen jou huwelik. Onthou net, “Wanneer die stryd God sin is, is die oorwinning ons sin!”

Just like with all real wars, not all the battles are won by the same side so do not be discouraged if you have fallen short and made mistakes. We have the comfort of knowing that He hears us immediately, but His response may sometimes seem slow.

Net soos met alle regte oorloë, nie al die stryde word deur dieselfde kant gewen nie so moet nie ontmoedig word as jy tekort geskiet het en foute gemaak het nie. Ons het die troos om te weet dat Hy ons onmidellik hoor, maar sy reaksie mag somtyds stadig wees.

In the book of Daniel, an angel spoke to him and gave us these insights: “…from the first day that you set your heart on understanding this and on humbling yourself before God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to your words. But the prince of Persia was withstanding me for twenty-one days.” Dan. 10:12-13. It may take some time to win the battles, so do not become weary. “But as for you, brethren, do not grow weary of doing good.” 2Ths. 3:13.

In die boek van Daniël, het ‘n engel met hom gepraat en aan hom hierdie insig gegee: “...van die eerste dag wat jy jou hart daarop gerig het om ag te gee en jou voor die aangesig van jou God te verootmoedig, is jou woorde gehoor, en om jou woorde se ontwil het ek gekom. Maar die vors van die koninkryk van die perse het een en twintig dae lank teenoor my gestaan…” Dan. 10:12-13. Dit sal tyd vat om die stryd te wen, so moenie moeg word nie. “En julle, broeders, moet nie in goeddoen verflou nie.” 2 Tess. 3:13)

His timing. One thing you must also understand is that God seems to work on ONE thing at a time. We must work with Him in His timing. This does not mean we need to wait to pray; it only means we need to wait for God to change the situation at the proper time. Thank God that He doesn’t dump (through conviction) all our sins on top of us all at once! Just use the time while you wait to pray.

Sy tydsberekening. Een ding wat jy ook  moet verstaan is dat dit lyk asof God EEN ding op ‘n slag bewerk. Ons moet saam Hom werk in Sy tydsberekening. Dit beteken nie ons moet wag om te bid nie; dit beteken net ons moet wag vir God om die situasie te verander op die regte tyd. Dank die Here dat Hy nie alles (deur veroordeling) op een slag op ons laai nie! Neem die tyd terwyl jy wag om te bid.

Personal commitment: to allow God to change me. “Based on what I have learned from God’s Word, I commit to seeking God and His Word to increase my faith is His ability to restore my marriage. I will fight fear by keeping my eyes on Jesus the Author and Finisher of my faith.”

Persoonlike verbintenis: om God toe te laat om my te verander. “Gebaseer op wat ek geleer het uit God se Woord, verbind ek my om God en Sy Woord te begeer en om my geloof te vermeerder in Sy vermoë om my huwelik te herstel. Ek sal vrees oorwin deur my oë op Jesus die Skrywer en Voldoener van my geloof te hou.”