“He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside quiet waters.
He restores my soul.”
—Psalm 23: 2-3
About a month ago I told the Lord I felt He may be showing me that it was time to let go of RMIOU due to the enormous and ongoing struggles that were wearing me out. But also, because we had failed to see the fruits of our labors. Instead of it helping to train ministers to help carry the load of RMI, the majority of my time was spent working with our ministers and trying to train them. Clearly, too, I knew the stress and weariness wasn’t from Him and therefore, this wasn’t His yoke.
“For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light.” Matthew 11:30
Soon after I told the Lord I was letting go, things made a sudden turn upward, of course, because I was letting go. Yet, even though things improved there were still many questions that I continued to SG about.
Then, not surprisingly, the real breakthrough happened due to a huge trial. God used a trial in my personal life for good in order to show me what now seems so obvious, but quite honestly, had eluded me all these years. What we are really designed to do as Ministers—thus what I needed to do to train our ministers in RMIOU—was to simply feed those broken souls He sent to us, feeding them His spiritual truths.
Feed My Sheep
"The third time He said to him, 'Simon son of John, do you love Me?' Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, 'Do you love Me? and he said, 'Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.'
Jesus replied, “Then feed My sheep." John 21:17-19 NIV
What I finally realized was that it’s not about us interacting or ministering one-on-one, because when men and women are hurt as horribly as they are when they come looking for us, they need the Comfort of the Lord, their Beloved.
True, we’ve understood that for a while, but nevertheless, I began to see I was still teetering or dabbling too closely to believing that in some way we needed to help them on an individual basis, one-on-one, which has the propensity or tendency to slip right into the dangers of counseling.
I also wrongly believed that helping to “correct” those seeking our help would benefit them. Not surprisingly, very few were able to handle our correction accurately, due again, to being so badly wounded, which is why He sent them to us. Honestly, I should have known because our men’s ministry’s name is, after all, Encouraging Men not “correcting men”!
What I’ve come to understand is this: what is able to Feed more of His Sheep (and younger lambs); what will also bring about the greater amount of Encouragement; what will do more to spreading the truth and Good News— is when we step back and simply spiritually FEED men and women through a variety of Encouragement. In other words, through our Encourager, and our many Free courses—each filled with His healing Word.
"He sent His Word and healed them, and delivered them from ALL their destructions [their graves, certain death]." Psalm 107:20
Whenever we become weary and ineffective as ministers, it’s due to entangling ourselves with a hurting and desperate and drowning person who doesn’t need us—he needs a Savior, a Heavenly Father, the Prince of Peace, and every other Person He can be to him.
Once I finally understood this revelation fully, I was then able to understand why RMIOU wasn’t flourishing the way I knew it could or should—because it’s foundation wasn’t poured correctly. Rather than training “Marriage Ministers” in the way that I was trying to do, being involved and entangled with men and women who fill out a MEQ “Marriage Evaluation Questionnaire,” He wants us to step back and simply offer them our Free Course 1, encouraging them to begin to heal.
The definition of the verb to “minister” is defined as “attend to the needs of (someone).” And if there is one thing I know for sure is that His people, who are called by His name, are desperately perishing due to the lack of knowledge and spiritually nutritious food—spiritual nourishment they are starving for. This is why the Lord has continually reminded me that my top priority, and that of this ministry, is to spiritually feed men and women daily, as I said, through our daily newsletters.
And along with this daily Spiritual Feeding Program for those who are starving for the truth as a way to start their day, with our newsletters (in order to get them started in the right direction along the day’s narrow road), men and women also need an array of spiritual truths, which they will need to sustain them, and it’s where the variety of our courses come in. Though our books changed many lives, the combination of reading and then pouring their hearts out, by journaling, we have witnessed so many men and women recover from their crisis so much faster—with longer lasting results! Finally finding joy by being encouraged to not take hold of our hands or look to us in any way, but instead taking HIS hand, looking to HIM to guide them, asking HIM to reveal the truths they need and are desperate for.
“He leads me” Psalm 23:2
“They looked to Him and were radiant, and their faces will never be ashamed.” Psalm 34:5
It’s due entirely to our relationship with Him that we are able to glow, which is what will help others see us when they’re surrounded by their darkness and pain. Yet when the hurting finds us, it’s His warmth and light that shines on us, which is what they really need to follow—much like the moon reflects the light of the sun and is "in reality" a barren dusty desert.